


Crush

by TheHuntress25



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Drama, F/M, Humor, Other, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-31
Updated: 2016-05-31
Packaged: 2018-07-11 07:08:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7035037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheHuntress25/pseuds/TheHuntress25
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fred Weasley has never experienced having a crush until he recieves a love letter that he believes has come from Alicia Spinnet. He has never felt so lucky but love tends to spiral in all directions and can lead more than one person to heartache.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crush

I feel a little rush whenever I see you.

Fred Weasley stared down at the neatly written words with a bewildered smile, thumb rubbing along an ink stain at the very bottom of the parchment. There was no signature and he had spent the past several minutes trying to figure out who would leave him what he supposed was the end of a love letter, it was clear that it had been written with care. 

The common room was dreary this afternoon and Fred went unnoticed as he sat alone at a study table, a pile of neglected textbooks littered around him. He had found the letter tucked neatly inside his Potions textbook earlier and had been trying to solve the mystery ever since, he hadn't intended on studying the whole day and welcomed the distraction. 

Fred ran his fingers through the long strands of his red hair, scanning the parchment again:

I feel a little rush whenever I see you.

The parchment had been obviously ripped violently and Fred fingered the torn bits gently, wondering if this might be some kind of mistake. He tried to remember if anyone had borrowed his textbook the last few days but came up with nothing, which meant that whoever wrote this had probably sought him out specifically. 

Who would write something like this about him? Fred frowned thoughtfully, trying to conjure an image in his mind that fit the sweetness of the mysterious note. He was pretty certain that it was a girl because there weren't any boys in his year that used pink ink but he wouldn't put it past George or Lee Jordan to pull a prank like this. 

Fred felt his lips pulling up with a smile before he recalled that George was studying with Angelina in a fit of desperation to be near her for the day. George usually avoided the library like the plague but there wasn't much that he wouldn't do for Angelina Johnson and he wouldn't waste precious time writing this letter. 

Lee Jordan never hesitated to pull a good prank but Fred doubted that his friend had been able to find a moment to slip out of Snape's dungeon today. Lee had gotten a detention yesterday for some comment he had made to Snape, Fred couldn't remember what it had been exactly but it had had something to do with shoving shampoo where the critters didn't shine. 

Fred stifled a laugh and wondered if Lee would be half dead the next time they saw each other. It was a fact that Snape didn't have an ounce of pity in his soul, though people highly doubted that he had one to begin with. Potions was one of Fred's favorite classes but he would be a liar if he said that Snape made the lessons pleasant, “Bloody bastard.” He murmured.

George was terrible at Potions and Snape never failed to remind his brother of that but Fred noticed that he merely curled his upper lip when he concocted something brilliant. The Slytherins had it easy but he had to admit that it rankled sometimes to never get the recognition he deserved, “You'll have my thanks when the world is a better place, Weasley.” Snape had sneered when Fred had stupidly grumbled this in his presence. 

Prick, Fred had thought irritably. 

Fred pushed the unsavory image of Snape from his mind and stretched, his muscles screaming in relief after being seated for so long. He yawned and regarded the note once more, wondering why the person had slipped it inside of his Potions textbook instead of taking him aside and handing it over like all the other girls he had dated.

He was pretty popular and was far from shy so he had never had much trouble picking up girls, they all wanted the same thing and nothing at all. Fred was never serious about any of them but he wondered if he might have passed a good thing by more than once. George warned that he would regret not finding someone to get serious about but his brother could hardly talk when he didn't even have the courage to ask Angelina out.

Fred didn't understand how his brother could practically worship Angelina for the goddess that she was and not date her. The most aggravating thing in the world was watching George moping around all day whining about how Angelina would suddenly fall in love with some random, outrageously spectacular bloke and forget about him. 

“Merlin you are pathetic. What's wrong?” Fred had snapped last night when he had finally had enough. 

George had appeared embarrassed before explaining. “I overheard Angie telling Katie that some bloke in Herbology might ask her out and—”

“How many times have I told you that she doesn't belong to you?” Fred had snarled.

“How often must you act like a prick?” George had spat back.

“How much time do you have?” Fred had countered dryly.

George had heaved a sigh. “You wouldn't understand what this is like,”

“I sure as hell don't understand. Just ask Angie out and stop being such a—”

“You've never loved anyone the way I love her.” George had interrupted firmly.

Fred had flushed with annoyance. “What makes you say that?”

“It's the truth, you never see any of the girls you date as anything special.” George had remarked with a warning glance that had made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. They had been lounging alone in the dorm at the time so neither of them had worried about being overheard, “every girl you date isn't a toy and they're not disposable.”

“Look, I don't treat any of the girls that I've been with that way.” Fred's voice had held a tinge of anger but George had merely stared at him, seeing through the lie easily. He had turned away with a curse, “if I meet someone that I want instead of someone that wants me, then maybe I'll understand.” 

“What do you mean?” George had asked, concerned.

Fred had given him a hard stare. “I mean that I'm not a toy either.” 

The conversation had ended abruptly when Lee had swaggered into the dorm with a small bag of jelly imps that Katie had lost in one of their latest bets. Fred still didn't understand quite what he had meant by his comment but he acknowledged that there was no one who really knew him. The vulnerable and broken parts...the piece of him that wasn't always smiling. 

He loved people but knew that didn't necessarily mean they loved him back.

Fred felt an uncomfortable sting in his chest and stared down at the parchment again, wondering why it made him happy. There was a girl out there...a shy girl that fancied him, huh? He tried to think of who it could be but no one immediately came to mind. 

Angelina would never be interested in him, everyone in the whole bloody Tower knew that she was in love with George and Fred thought of her like a sister. Katie had been trying to bully Oliver Wood into dating her since they were kids and Fred didn't think that she would ever fancy anyone else no matter if she tried to say otherwise. 

That only left one person in their close group of friends and Fred scoffed at the stupidity of it, there was no way that Alicia Spinnet would write him a love letter. Alicia was a surreal beauty and even though it was clear that she should have been sent back to heaven where she belonged, Fred had determined that she was off limits.

Fred would have looked like an idiot trying to ask someone like her out and they had grown up together on the pitch. He had never thought of her like a sister but she was just too much of everything and there wasn't an ounce of himself that he could give to her. Alicia was perfection itself and they shared a lot of things in common but there was something about her that was unreachable....

He had never even really thought of Alicia as more than a friend but suddenly he was unable to get the idea out of his head. Could she really have sent him this letter? Fred knew that Alicia wasn't the sort of person that opened up to people easily but they had been friends for years...why would she keep this a secret and not let him know?

Fred felt an uncomfortable stirring of hope in his chest and wanted to bash his head against the wall, he was going to turn into his brother at this rate. There was no point in wasting time when he could just be brave and ask Alicia upfront about the letter and with that in mind, Fred stood and shoved his textbooks into his bag. 

He tucked the note carefully in his robe pocket. “Please don't be a joke,” 

A small fire had been lit in his chest that Fred couldn't explain and it reminded him terribly of hope, the most dangerous thing a person could feel. It only took him a few minutes to dart upstairs, dump his bag on George's bed in their dorm and rush back downstairs, “Oi!” Katie Bell huffed when Fred almost ran her down.

“Sorry, Katie.” Fred laughed, steadying her.

Katie pinched his nose. “Where're you going in such a hurry?”

Fred tugged her cheek in return. “Vwhy yew vwanna know?” 

Katie squirmed and released him. “You almost crashed into me!”

Fred gave her cheek a light pat. “Sorry, I'm on my way to pick Lee up from detention,” he lied.

“Detention?” Katie asked, surprised. 

Fred grinned. “Yeah, he told Snape to shove something up his you-know-what.”

“That's why he never showed up at the Astronomy Tower!” Katie grumbled while twirling a lock of her wavy brown hair around a manicured finger. Fred waggled his eyebrows, “it's not like that! I needed his advice and he always knows the right thing to say.” She said hastily. “Lee's not the romantic sort but he always listens to me whenever I whine about Oliver.” 

Fred was surprised by this and figured that there were plenty of things that he didn't know about Lee no matter how long he had known his friend. Lee was an only child and his parents had divorced when he was young, so Fred and his brother had sort of adopted him. “That explains why the two of you sneak off together so much.”

Katie nodded. “He's my best friend.”

“I thought Alicia and Angelina were your best friends?” Fred asked, scandalized.

“The difference with that is I'd marry them. I wouldn't marry Lee,” Katie said proudly.

Fred burst out laughing. “Merlin, you must be desperate.”

Katie's brown eyes took on a manic light. “If I can't have Oliver, I'll marry one of the girls.”

Fred tugged on her hair lightly. “Have you seen Alicia around?”

“No, not really.” Katie said with a shrug.

“You're no good to me. I'll see you later,” Fred replied lazily.

Katie waved him off glumly and Fred tried not to spring towards the portrait hole, his chest pounding a mile a minute. The corridor was uncomfortably chilly as he walked and he wondered if the Dementors could be felt even inside the castle walls, shuddering slightly at the image that went through his active mind. 

Fred didn't think that they would have much luck catching the notorious Sirius Black, however and that didn't quite frighten him as much as it should. He was intrigued by the possibility that anyone could be sane enough to escape from Azkaban, it had to take more courage than anyone was willing to admit and he respected that. 

“Bitch!”

The curse was like a crack of lightning and Fred snapped out of his thoughts abruptly, hearing the pop of spells down the corridor. A shrill scream followed and he rushed towards the sound, nearly tripping as he managed to yank his wand from the depths of his robes. Fred heard another scream, another little pop that made him wince and he followed the noise until he was skidding and sliding like a madman on the stone floor. 

“You little shit! I told you that the next time I caught you picking on this girl that I was going to make it your last.” Alicia's furious voice cried. Fred imagined her being attacked by a group of Slytherin punks and by the time he found them, he was panting and wheezing like he had fought several battles and had saved the world. 

Alicia was indeed facing off against Slytherin punks but what Fred hadn't counted on was the fact that they would merely be third years. Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle were writhing on the floor while several orange boils sprouted over their faces like mushrooms, “Err...what the hell is going on?” Fred croaked in a weak voice, trying his best not to double over. 

“Fred?” Alicia asked, spotting him.

“That's what people call me.” Fred wheezed.

Alicia's face broke out into a bright smile and he thought his eyes watered from the purity of it, she had such a radiance about her. That pale blonde hair and those big blue eyes....it was hard not to think of the beautiful photos he had seen of Veela whenever he looked at her, “Are you okay? You look like you're about to pass out.” Alicia said worriedly.

Fred braced his hand on the nearest wall. “I'll...I'll be all right. I thought you were in trouble,”

“Why would you think something like that?” Alicia asked with a frown.

Malfoy groaned weakly. 

“I heard screaming and it sounded like a fight broke out.” Fred explained before straightening himself.

Alicia snorted and he noticed for the first time that she had her arms wrapped tightly around a girl that appeared to be suffocating from the close embrace. Fred could only make out brown hair and the flash of violet eyes glowering in his direction, “I was on my way to the dungeons when I caught Malfoy and these bastards cornering this kid.” 

Fred scowled and shot the boys a disgusted glance that made Crabbe's ugly face pale. If there was one thing in the world that he hated more than a person without a sense of humor, it was a shameless bully and it took a few seconds for his rage to simmer down. “What should we do with them?” he asked the girl curiously.

Alicia shrugged. “I don't care what happens to them.”

“Does that mean I can drag them to the Headmaster's office?” Fred asked, smiling evilly.

Malfoy flinched and through some grace of God was able to pull himself up. He roughly yanked Goyle up by the collar before kicking at Crabbe to come to his feet, “...I'll...I'll get you for this!” he threatened at Alicia viciously. His silver hair was standing on end and Fred thought there was something not quite right about the way his grey eyes hovered over the girl in Alicia's arms, “you had better watch your back Half and Half.”

The three boys lumbered off wincing and cursing, barely sparing Fred a glance and he was tempted to hex them while their backs were turned. Alicia sent a stinging jinx at Crabbe's head before the three rounded the corner and Fred laughed as he heard a howl, “I can't stand bullies.” Alicia growled and there was a fire in her eyes that made his chest ache.

“You've caught them picking on this girl before?” Fred asked, pointing at the violet eyes.

Alicia nodded, patting the girl's head. “This is the third time.”

“Uhm, can you let me go now?” the girl asked awkwardly.

Alicia hastily released her and smoothed back the tangles in her brown hair, the sight making Fred grin despite himself. He was surprised to see that the girl was another Slytherin and he found it odd that he had never seen her before, “I'm really sorry about nearly suffocating you in my boobs. I just get really fired up when I see people getting picked on.”

“...It's...It's okay,” the girl mumbled.

Fred had an uneasy feeling that the girl was used to being bullied and was disturbed as he remembered the way Malfoy had stared at her. “Are you going to be all right?” Alicia asked the girl softly, reeking of concern. “I could walk you back to your dorm and tell a teacher.”

That caused the girl's violet eyes to widen in alarm. “No, that's okay.”

“If you're scared of Malfoy—” Alicia began.

A peculiar expression flashed over the girl's face and Fred had the strangest feeling that she had much bigger things to fear than someone like Draco Malfoy. “I'm not afraid of worms. Thank you for your help,” he heard the girl murmur politely. She shot him a wary glance that made him feel like dragon dung before heading in the opposite direction, head bent low and he hoped that she would be able to handle herself alone. 

“Why were Malfoy and his friends bullying her?” Fred asked, frowning.

“She's half-blood and from a poor family.” Alicia said with a scowl that made her resemble a vengeful spirit. Fred noticed that she had a slight cut on her right cheek and supposed that one of the boys had shot a curse her way, “I've seen her around a few times and overheard Parkinson and her lot talking about her.”

Fred thought that he couldn't hate Draco Malfoy more than he did already but he understood why Alicia had become so infuriated. Her family was deeply prejudiced and she had grown up hearing the same bit of poison that Malfoy seemed to favor so much, “It was good of you to help her but looks like you have a battle scar.” He loped towards her and reached out to touch the mark on her pale cheek. “Everyone is going to be worried.”

Alicia laughed. “Over a scratch? Hardly.”

A mewl interrupted Fred's next words and he was aggravated to see Mrs. Norris watching them from a few feet away, tail swishing. The cat was gone by the time he aimed his wand at her and he knew that Filch would soon be on his way, “We'd better get out of here. All that shouting probably has Filch just hopping out of his trousers.” He groaned.

“Where should we go?” Alicia asked, paling.

Fred heard the ominous sound of Filch's raspy breathing and hastily grabbed Alicia's hand and bolted in the opposite direction. Alicia was gasping with laughter by the time he frantically shoved them into a broom cupboard, “Hush, he's going to find us if you don't be quiet.” Fred scolded as he tried not to gag on the smell of cleaning potions and dust.

Alicia was overcome with giggles and buried her face against his chest while Fred tried not to stumble back in surprise. Sponges, brooms, mops, buckets and a worrying amount of slime was everywhere but he suddenly felt like he were in paradise, “I'm sorry but...your face...you looked...you looked...so funny and....” she was gasping. “It was so cute...like a little boy...”

Fred didn't find it all that amusing but he remained quiet and focused on the scent of her perfume and a sweetness that belonged to her alone. He was starting to get nervous. It was too cramped in this bloody cupboard and Alicia hadn't seemed to notice that her body was pressed against his in the most amazing, embarrassing way possible. 

Are you there, God? It's me, Fred. He thought, panicking. 

Alicia's giggles took a long time to subside and Fred could hear the blood pounding in his ears like the most barbaric drum. He heard Filch mumbling outside and tensed with both excitement and dread, his wand clutched tightly in his hand. “They're around here somewhere, my sweet.” Filch dribbled and he heard Mrs. Norris mewl irritably as they passed them by. 

Silence.

Fred's heart was thumping violently and he swallowed roughly for a few minutes in an effort not to say something completely stupid. Alicia slowly released him and he stared down at her in amusement when he saw her face turning red— “Merlin, this is not what it looks like!” she cried, shaking him. His head felt like it was about to pop off as she shook him again, “can you imagine if someone opened this door and caught us like this?”

“It'd be pretty—my neck is attached to my shoulders you know!” Fred snapped. 

Alicia released him hastily and tried to scramble away from him, not counting on the fact that there was nowhere to go. The broom cupboard was smaller than Fred had counted on and packed near to bursting and she barely had room to breathe. “Sorry!” she said when her hand accidentally smacked him hard in the face.

Fred rubbed the spot. “S'okay,”

“It's so crowded in here—what the hell is this?!” Alicia cried with a squeal when her hands connected with the questionable slime all around them. Fred roared with laughter as she wiped it on her robes and fretted, “shut up, Fred!” she snarled.

Fred could barely control himself and he rummaged around in his robes for something to wipe the filth from her skin and accidentally withdrew the love letter. Alicia snatched it from him without looking, a queasy expression on her face that quickly morphed into horror when she focused on the object in her hand. “Can I have that back?” he asked uncomfortably. 

“I..I wrote this.” Alicia murmured.

“That's great but can I have it back?” Fred asked stupidly.

Alicia's blue eyes widened, her mouth opening and closing in shock. “H...how...”

“I found it in my Potions textbook.” Fred's mouth was suddenly dry.

Alicia appeared confused, hurt and terrified. “But...why?”

Fred folded his arms anxiously. “Well, I bought it in Diagon Alley like all the other lads and ladies—”

“That's not what I mean!” Alicia cried, distressed.

A paralyzing silence seemed to grip them and Fred wondered if it were possible to sink into the blue of someone's eyes without drowning. He felt that same something....that something that was too similar to hope but he was too afraid to say anything. Alicia ran her eyes over the parchment anxiously and there was an ache there that made it clear that he had missed something, “You didn't write that about me did you?” 

The question jolted Alicia out of her shock and she stared at him...she stared at him and Fred could see himself reflected back in her eyes. Hope was dimming and fading out like a firework in a never ending black sky, “Fred, I'm so sorry.” She finally whispered. “I didn't...I didn't think that this would happen or that you would...I'm just so sorry.” 

“Do you like me, Alicia?” Fred asked, hurt.

Alicia's voice shook. “Of course I like you, Fred but—”

“Why did you put that in my textbook?” Fred demanded angrily.

“I didn't—” Alicia denied.

Fred forced himself not to yell. “Then why is it there?”

“I wrote it for Lee!” Alicia burst out, trembling.

Fred sucked in a sharp breath. “...Right.” 

“I heard that Snape would have him in the dungeons this afternoon and I wanted to stop by and see him when his detention was over, I wanted to see if my letter meant something.” Alicia explained with a sad smile that caused Fred's wounded heart to bleed all over again. “It took me almost a week to finally get the courage to even write the bloody thing, I've always loved him and I caught him using your textbook the other day so I slipped it in, thinking that he would see it.”

Fred swallowed roughly, trying not to bleed. “I...I understand. Lee's a lucky guy,”

Alicia shook her head sharply and he watched as the locks of her light hair sparkled in the dark, making him want to reach out. Reach out and do something that would amount to nothing in the end. “There's no chance that he'll ever feel the same way about me!” she cried and her eyes began to glisten as if she had been holding back her pain for a long, long time. 

I don't want to hear anymore, Fred thought dimly. 

“Lee seems to like Katie the most....” Alicia murmured brokenly.

I don't want to hear this, Fred's mind screamed.

Alicia wiped at her eyes shakily. “I know that they're friends but I just get so jealous,”

Please, stop. Fred wanted to shout.

“I hate seeing them together, I hate knowing that there are broken parts of him that I'll never understand or be able to heal.” Alicia's voice held a trace of miserable anger that Fred had never heard before. He could see her for the first time and he wanted her all the more, “Lee will always just be my friend but I wanted to change that, which is why I wrote that letter and put it into his—your textbook.” She sniffled and wiped at her eyes. “I wanted to be brave.”

A silence hung over their heads for what felt like hours and Fred wondered if he were sinking into what could only be described as Hell. How could a heart shatter so well? “I'm sure that Lee doesn't really see how much you care about him.” Fred eventually said and he wanted to hurl himself into a raging storm until he was swept away. “...I'm sure he doesn't know.”

“But he ripped my letter....” Alicia mumbled in a soft voice, staring down at the parchment in agony. 

“I'm sure he didn't do it on purpose,” Fred said in a dull voice he didn't recognize.

Alicia ran a finger over her beautiful words. “Why wouldn't he?”

Fred bit back a harsh retort. “He probably just didn't notice what you wrote.”

Alicia gave a bitter laugh and wiped at her tears. “He doesn't even notice me when I'm standing right next to him, why would he even care about a letter?” she tossed the note onto the floor. “I'm so sorry that you got mixed up with all of this. If I weren't such a coward then maybe I could have been brave enough to tell him how I felt but I'm just too scared...”

Fred barely heard the words and realized that hope was a dangerous thing but he finally understood the horror that George lived with everyday. All of the doubts, wistful glances and lingering smiles finally made sense and Fred felt like the worst person in the world for mocking him all this time. I can't even imagine living like this for another few minutes, how does he get through it every single day without breaking open? He thought. 

It hurt.

It hurt so much.

Alicia's soft fingers curled around his and Fred was surprised when he didn't jerk away, hating himself for sinking all over again the moment their eyes met. “I didn't mean for this to happen, please don't be angry with me.” She pleaded and it was enough to kill the despair in his heart. “You're my friend and I care about you but it's always been Lee.” Her lips pulled up in a wry smile, “I never even thought you would think of me that way.”

“I like the idea of you.” Fred admitted and he was unsure what possessed him but he reached out and in the blink of an eye, had kissed her. It wasn't anything really, just a peck and she was so surprised by the brief contact that it may as well have never happened. “I was the one who got my hopes up, you didn't do anything wrong.” 

“I'm just really sorry—” Alicia started sincerely.

Fred pressed his forehead against hers. “Can I ask you something?”

“S-sure,” Alicia stammered nervously.

“If there's ever a time when you stop loving Lee and need someone...will you come to me?” Fred asked gently. That stunned both of them and he waiting patiently for a response, tempted to kiss her again in the way he really wanted to. “Will you?”

Alicia shifted away, face flushed. “I...I don't know.”

God, this hurts. Fred thought bleakly.

“W-we should get out of here.” Alicia suggested anxiously.

Fred nodded and listened for a moment before placing his hand on the doorknob and opening it with a silent gasp of relief. Alicia slipped out quickly but he lingered behind, hating everything so strong that he had to stop and remind himself that life had a way of changing in the most unexpected ways. There might be hope.

It still hurts, Fred's mind whispered. 

He scanned the slime ridden floor and scooped up Alicia's love letter, carefully opening it carefully and cradling it in his palm. Fred ran his eyes over the words that didn't belong to him before slipping it into his trouser pocket and shutting the cupboard door behind him, Alicia appearing like a glowing star that he knew would never belong to him. 

“Think about what I said, I'll be here.” Fred told her before she could fade away forever. Alicia stared up at him with those wide, blue eyes and remained unreachable. “Give yourself some time and think about it.”

**Author's Note:**

> This was the first Fred Weasley fan fic that I wrote and it was way more challenging than I thought. Thanks for reading and everything!


End file.
